The Beauty of Your Gap-Toothed Smile

How I think about you, stretched halfway across Brooklyn
among million dollar apartments and flea markets
while I am nestled in a window at the bottom of a hill,
the gray sky wilting all my hope
of ever seeing you again,
begging for the sky to turn
the color of your flawless eyes
which connected to me so easily.
How I think of your gap-toothed smile
and wonder if I will ever see it again,
or hear you breathe my name
in the gentleness of the morning,
or your soft steps as you passed me
like sleet on drifts of darkened snow.
But, as endless as our winter,
is the hope my heart has held.
Will it ever be August again?

The light went out...

And, it’s done, over, finished. So many words for a simple thing like the end.
It has been over long time ago but today it feels real.

Something that was mine dissolved, changed shape, never to be mine again.
Yes, I am saying mine even though you were never mine, you were always yours only.
I have been missing you and I am going to miss you, no doubt about it.
So many questions I have, even if I got one answer, I know its not enough, but I am keeping my promise.
When I think of you , sadness envelops me, for all that was, for all that never was and for all that could have been.
Ice cube on my palm, it will melt slowly, turn to puddle and eventually will disappear.... like you ...

Can't stop thinking about you....

I see a beautiful sky, or a storm rolling in, and I think of the times we spent watching them, admiring them, together. I see the birds flying past or landing in my yard and remember when you took me to see one special bird, the first time I'd seen one. Something happens, whether good, bad or indifferent, and I pick up the phone to call you. Then I remember. You don't care. I go to the harbor and something always reminds me of you. I can't go on that beautiful path without crying. Nights are the worst. I lay in bed, trying to sleep, and feel you next to me. I reach out and actually FEEL you there, feel your chest, the rise and fall of your breath. I feel you gently scratching my arm and I smile. I turn to look, and you aren't there. It's killing me.